Restless til I rest in You

The past few weeks have been crazy with work and projects, I've been cherishing my short time early in the morning when I can sit down and just be with God and I've been blown away by the fact that in Christ we are children of God and have access to His kingdom. WE HAVE ACCESS TO THE KINGDOM OF GOD, and although the gift is free and is given freely- it came at a cost. Jesus came to earth, became a human- something that was completely selfless. Christ probably wasn’t thinking- I’d like to know what it’s like to live in a world full of sin and evil- where people live under the reign of Satan instead of my Father, but He did it for us. We have been given the gift of eternal life through Christ’s sacrificial love for us- so should we desire to live a life of sacrifice in return? A life fully trusting in God, relying on Him for all of our needs and desires, life yearning to please our King is what we were made for.

Over the summer a passage that I continued to look back on was Jeremiah 17, it has become a favorite since then.

“This is what the Lord says: Cursed is the one who trust in man, who depends on flesh for his strength and whose heart turns away from the Lord. He will be like a bush in the wastelands; he will dwell in the parched places of the desert in a salt land where no one lives.”(Verses 5-6)

How often do we depend on others for our strength- do we run to them for comfort and help? I know that more frequently than not, I seek peoples approval and comfort before I go to God and rest in His arms. There’s a song by Audrey Assad that says “I’m restless until I rest in You,” we were hand created by God, for His glory and purposes and cannot be filled or satisfied by anything or anyone other than him. These verses say that a person who seeks after/depends on humans for strength will live in the wastelands, the parched places of the desert, in a salt land where no one lives. I picture a tree in the desert with no leaves dry with no supply of water and no way to be nourished.

“But blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in Him. He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.” (verses 7-8)

These verses are so full of hope and promise. Those who trust in the Lord, who find their confidence in Him are like a tree who never has to worry about how it will continue to thrive and grow and never fails to bear fruit. If our trust wholly rests in the hands of our creator we have no reason to fear or lack in confidence because the God who made the universe is holding our life. If we live each moment to seek and know Him, to glorify Him in our lives so that He becomes greater we become less we will be like a tree whose roots go down in a stream and always have a source of life.
It’s crazy sometimes how when God’s teaching you something it’s like the repeat button is on everything you hear or say, everything ‘happens’ to have a common theme- I don’t believe it’s a coincidence.

In church the past few weeks the pastor has been going through Proverbs 3, it’s been so cool to see that the whole chapter is really about trust- I’ve grown up knowing the verses 5-6

“Trust in the Lord with all you heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.”

Trust means to take refuge, put confidence in, Lean means to rest upon, seek support of, and ‘our own understanding’ means our own skills, intelligence, senses and emotion. On our own, apart from Jesus we can do nothing, as much as we try or think we can, we can’t. Take refuge, put your confidence and trust in the Lord with your whole heart, rest upon, seek support of, rely and lean not on ourselves but on Christ and He will supply me with all that we need and we will have no reason to fear when hard times come because the creator of the world holds us and our confidence is in Him.

Looking Back and Moving Forward

So it's nearing the end of my second week of school. I'm all settled into my room and getting used to being back.I'm working at remembering and living out the lessons God taught me this summer by trying to let go and surrender each day to Christ.
Today I have for the most part free, so I decided to sit down and read through my journal from Togo (or at least some of it, it's pretty long!) I found an entry from the third week where I listed all of the lessons I had learned so far on the journey, this is it :)

"Lessons learned from Togo

Though I've only been here for a few short weeks I've already learned so much that I don't want to ever forget.
I've learned how blessed I truly am, I grew up in a place where material things are taken for granted, and so easily I'm blinded and forget how much I'm blessed each day. I've seen how truly lucky I am.

I've seen how faithful God is and learned the power of prayer. I've learned the importance of abiding in God ALONE.

I've seen how much control and how many distractions Satan uses to draw me away from God. I've learned that if I just spend the time I set apart for God for HIS glory, and really dig deep, how much He has to reveal to me. I've learned that abiding and trusting God with everything means fully surrendering without fear or doubt.

I've learned how little I know and how much I need to learn.

I've seen firsthand how God can use anything He wants, even the color of my skin to reveal His glory. I've realized how often I limit God's power in my mind and I know that He is capable of much more than i can imagine and does things in HIS timing HIS way. I've learned how sweet and good His timing and and His way really are.

I've seen poverty and lifestyles I hardly believed existed or had only read about it books or seen on t.v. I've seen how much joy that believers living in those hard situations have and how they realize that this life isn't about them or their wants or needs, but God is good despite the circumstances and His joy lasts.

I've seen how much sin reigns over peoples lives and how much we are in need of a Savior. I've learned how strong Satan is, but how much STRONGER God is. I've learned that PERFECT LOVE casts out ALL fear.

I've learned that when you turn all your worries and anxieties over to Christ FULLY and lay them at the cross He will supply all you need and FILL you with a peace and joy beyond any we have tried to build for ourselves or find here on this earth. And indescribable peace and joy that can only come from Christ.

I've learned that God is Sovereign and His ways and His purposes are higher than any of mine could ever be (by far.)

I've learned that even though at times I may feel worthless, useless or incomplete ONLY HE can fill me and satisfy all of my desires. God knows what I need. He is all I need.

I've seen the beauty of God's creation through His people, His scenery, in children's laughs and in the night sky. I've grown deeper in relationship with my Father in heaven and realize how far I have to go. It's come to my attention how frequently I've put my relationship with Christ on the sidelines of my life and how much I desire for Him to be my first priority in ALL areas of my life.

I've seen how powerful the gospel is and how through its simplicity and freedom people can be transformed. God is molding each of His children, God is transforming me, into His image.

I've realized that the bible is FULL of truth. Every single piece, every word, every promise. The creator of the WHOLE world loves me, takes care of me, provides all I need and I take it so lightly. I have no reason to be afraid or worried: the God who made the stars, the universe and everything in it is in control of my life.

I've learned more about God's gift of the Holy Spirt and how much His gift of grace and freedom from sin really is worth.

I've learned that although overseas missions isn't something I feel called to right now, His ministry is something that we as believers are called to each day, wherever we are in whatever we are doing. All we do should be done for His glory alone.

I've learned that although I often get nervous or afraid, unless I step out in faith and do what I'm afraid of and let go of my fears, those fears will never subside. Perfect love, only Christ's love, casts out fear.

I've seen how easy most American's have it materialistically and how entitled we think we are to having that ease. I've learned how worthless everything on this Earth is in comparison to Christ. I've learned to appreciate what I've been given more.

I've learned that each moment is its own and should be treated for what it is: a fleeting gift.

I've been reminded that my life is not my own, that the only purpose worth living for is God's.

I've seen, played with, and held some of the 'unloved' and 'unwanted' of this world and learned how much God's love alone is all that can satisfy. He is all they need, and He is all I need. As believers we are all called children of God.

I've learned that when you 'lose your life' for Christ that is when you find it.

I am hidden with Christ in God and He is all I need. All else can fade away, all I need is Jesus.

I've seen how much I struggle with pride, selfishness, patience, compassion, kindness, gentleness, and forgiveness (just to name a few) and know that only with the help of the Holy Spirit can any of that change.

I've been reminded of how unworthy I am of God's gift and how much I don't deserve His love and grace and how my life should be lived as a life of praise and thankfulness to the King.

I have been entrusted (1 Timothy 1:14) with the gift of the gospel, I am an heir to His inheritance and have access to the kingdom. I need to live a life worthy of the gospel (Philippians 1:27) and of the calling. I need to pour the fragrance of Christ wherever I am, during whatever I'm doing (2 Corinthians 2:14-15).

I want to daily live in His presence, soaking in as much of Him as I can and let it overflow to the world around me. I want Jesus to be the center and the source of my life."



"There is nothing good, nothing holy, nothing beautiful, nothing joyous which He is not to His servants. No one need to be poor, because, if he chooses, he can have Jesus for his own property and possession. No one need to be downcast, for Jesus is the joy of heaven, and it is His joy to enter into sorrowful hearts. We can exaggerate about many things; but we can never exaggerate our obligation to Jesus or the compassionate abundance of the love of Jesus to us. All our lives long we might talk of Jesus, and yet we should never come to and of the sweet things that might be said of Him. Eternity will not be long enough to learn all He is, or to praise Him for all he has done, but then, that matters not; for we shall be always with Him, and we desire nothing more." - A.W. Tozer