Before the Throne

Week six over: six down, three to go. It's crazy how fast the weeks have gone! This time four weeks from now I'll be gearing up for my first full week of student teaching! So exciting!

I've written before about how much I love worship lyrics, especially hymns and how much can be conveyed through them. I've spent the last few nights listening to worship music, reading and working on some projects for fun- so refreshing! Tonight there are some big storms going through the area and, with the rain beating against my window, I've been listening/singing/playing guitar along with some worship songs and stopped to listen carefully to the words to "Before the Throne", SUCH an encouraging song! Check out these lyrics:

Before the throne of God above
I have a strong and perfect plea
A great high Priest who’s name is Love
Who ever lives and pleads for me
My name is graven on His hands
My name is written on His heart
I know that while in heaven He stands
No tongue can bid me thence depart
No tongue can bid me thence depart

When Satan tempts me to despair
and tells me of the guilt within
upward I look and see Him there
Who made an end of all my sin
Because a sinless Savior died
my sinful soul is counted free
For God the just is satisfied
to look on Him and pardon me
to look on Him and pardon me

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Praise the One Risen Son of God.

Behold Him there, the risen Lamb
My perfect spotless righteousness
The great unchangeable I AM
The King of Glory and of grace
One in Himself, I cannot die
My soul is purchased by His blood
My life is hid with Christ on high
With Christ my Savior and my God
With Christ my Savior and my God

It's so incredibly humbling to remember that Christ died as a sacrifice taking on our full payment for sin, He took our place, and we are completely undeserving. We are loved, we are known, we are redeemed, forever by the unchangeable God.


(p.s. I realize this video is kind of strange to post but I found it and just loved this girl's voice too much to not share it!)

"In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace, which he lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight making known to us the mystery of his will, according to his purpose, which he set forth in Christ as a plan for the fullness of time, to unite all things in him, things in heaven and things on earth." Ephesians 1:7-10

"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation. Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, God making his appeal through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God. For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God." 2 Corinthians 5:17-21

Broken Cisterns

So this summer I've been slowly rereading a book that I was given last summer upon returning home from Togo. This morning I read a portion of the book that really got me thinking. The book is called Unearth and it's by Christy Vidrine and Autumn Rogers, I highly recommend it (especially if you've ever gone over seas or are planning to ever go).

"For my people have committed two evils: they have forsaken me, the fountain of living waters,and hewed out cisterns for themselves,broken cisterns that can hold no water." Jeremiah 2:13

"We were never made to love within our own power. We are broken cisterns and we spend most of our time and energy trying to keep enough 'water' to sustain ourselves. God knew this and that is why He tells us to stay near the living water. We must be ever renewed by Him if we are going to love others well. If Christ's love is the only thing that can truly sustain and fulfill you, then how can we ever love apart from it. God tells us our broken cisterns can hold no water; we must come to Him to provide."

Cisterns (from what I understand it after looking it up on the completely reliable source google ;)) are kind of like wells, they were used to hold water. Broken cisterns are practically worthless, dirt would enter the water making it pretty much unusable. We build our own cisterns we we try to control things or when we think we can do it all on our own. The cisterns we build are cracked unable to be fully filled or used. I'd imagine that when a cistern was cracked water would also leak out, making it nearly impossible to keep the cistern full. Without Him we can do nothing, without Him we are empty and unsatisfied. We are broken cisterns who need to rely on Him so He can fill in our cracks, make us whole, and use us for what we were intended.

Giving Him Control, I'm just a Sweaty Mess

Yesterday was probably the hottest day of the year. 102 with a "real feel" of 115= INSANE! The schedule at camp was changed so that the kids were ushered from the pool to a small trailer with air conditioning the whole day in order that no one would get sick and as far as I know- it worked! I started off the morning with a note from my 'secret buddy' (Secret buddies is something our camp does between staff memebers to encourage each other throughout the summer, each of us is given a name with a list of some of the things they enjoy so we know how best to encourage them). The note was a beautiful hand made card with this verse on it:

‎"This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it." Psalm 118:24

The verse was such a good reminder that even though the day was hot and gross, there was no real reason to complain because this day was handcrafted by God and our only response should really be thankfulness.
Although the day was sooooo hotttt (the kind of hot where you feel as if you're covered in sticky syrup and you're walking into an oven each time you step out of the air conditioning) I'm pretty sure it was my favorite day of camp thus far. This week, in general was probably my favorite week at camp my past four summers there. I really felt like I was doing what God created me to do, and if you've ever had that feeling before then you know what I'm talking about- if not, I can't describe it it's just too wonderful it's as if all the pieces have come together and you feel completely at home.

This week, I was the camp bible teacher which meant that each day I was given the opportunity to share the truths with each group of kids (minus preschool and kindergarten, they have a separate time for just them) every. day. The first day I was really nervous, especially when it came time for the 5th/6th grade boys group (you know how intimidating boys that age can be ;)). The camp gave me some ideas for each day to go along with the main lesson for the week "God is always with you" but essentially as long as I did the main topic for each day, I could do whatever else I felt led to do with each group. On Monday I went up to the pavilion for a half hour before the kids structured activities started to prepare my heart and calm my nerves, I spent time in the word and praying that He would be the one speaking to these kids, not me, that it would be all in His power. I prayed that their hearts would be open to what He had to teach them and that my fears and my own ideas wouldn't inhibit what he had for them in ANY way. I felt such peace after turning it all over to Him. God really taught me this week how He really has it all under control, we just have to let go and let Him do his thing. Of course there were many points this week, where I needed to be reminded that there was no reason for me to be nervous, because it's His power at work not mine and that I needed to trust that if I let go He would give the words the kids needed to hear.

Although all week was hot, as the week went on it got progressively hotter. Each Friday at camp we have chapel, in my last post I talked a little about chapel last week. Well, this week I was to give the message at chapel. Thursday night I stayed up later than I should reading and rereading what I had planned. Chapel is meant to be an overview of all that was taught in bible that week and a presentation of the gospel, this week the entire camp's theme was "We R Family" and in bible we talked about Ruth & Naomi, the trinity, and the body of Christ. I had talked with the kids about being a part of the family of God each day and tied each day back to it and how God created and loves each of us wholly and entirely so much that he sent His son to die for us, in our place, so that we could spend eternity with Him. I talked about the Holy Spirit and how once we become a part of the family of God we are promised the Holy Spirit, a special helper that comes to live inside of us when we make the decision to live for Christ, which is with us wherever we go.

At the beginning of Chapel I tried to carefully read through my bullet pointed list I had made so I wouldn't miss anything. Part way through, me a drippy sweaty mess and my thoughts slightly frantic, I gave up in trying read it. I thought you know what, I've been making such a point of leaning on God alllll week, why am I trying to take over and control this so much?! So I put the paper down and God gave me the words, and immediately I felt a sense of peace sweep over me! It was as if God was saying, "TRUST Me, my ways are so much better than yours and I've got this completely under control, I have a plan for this." Andddddd 14 kids professed that they put their faith in Christ yesterday! So exciting!

I'm going to end with a quote from a blog I've been following for a while, this girl's life is sooo encouraging!

"All I want is more eyes on Him. I am just a broken mess, grabbing for His feet, reaching out to touch His cloak, thankful for His mercy that washes over me. I am just a little girl, relieved to crawl into His lap and curl up there."

The Solid Rock

Last week at camp chapel the person giving the message used a visual where she put two cup houses in a basin. One cup house was rested on a rock and the other on a pile of sand (based off of the passage in Matthew 7). She dumped a pitcher of water into the basin and you guessed it... the sand pile dispersed. It was such a great image of what life living leaning on the Rock as opposed to trying to do it on our own. This parable is something I have heard over and over in my life but actually seeing a visual of it really got me thinking. Is my life built on the Rock in every area, or are there areas where I'm leaning on sand?

Ever since last Friday this song has been going through my head and tonight while listening to it I looked up the lyrics. I love hymns and the power that their words hold, this hymn does not disappoint!

The Solid Rock
My hope is built on nothing less
Than Jesus’ blood and righteousness;
I dare not trust the sweetest frame,
But wholly lean on Jesus’ name.

On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand,
All other ground is sinking sand.

When darkness veils His lovely face,
I rest on His unchanging grace;
In every high and stormy gale,
My anchor holds within the veil.

On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand,
All other ground is sinking sand.

His oath, His covenant, His blood
Support me in the whelming flood;
When all around my soul gives way,
He then is all my hope and stay.

On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand,
All other ground is sinking sand.

When He shall come with trumpet sound,
Oh, may I then in Him be found;
Dressed in His righteousness alone,
Faultless to stand before the throne.

On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand,
All other ground is sinking sand.

Apart from Him we can do nothing

This past week was the longest week ever. Camp everyday all day, then either vacation bible school at my church or working my first few days at my new job. After my first day I found myself exhausted, stressed out and emotionally drained- and that was just the first day (hence my last post). God clearly showed me in daily living that apart from Him I can do NOTHING.

"I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing." - John 15:5

He showed me that when I try to do it all on my own all I get is weak, moody and defeated. The lies of the devil take over and my attitude becomes far what it should be. I've found that when I spend time each morning- no matter how long or short devoted to focusing on the Father and just BEING with Him, life is so much more focused and I'm a completely different person. It makes such a difference.

This coming week I will be taking on the role of camp bible teacher while the regular bible teacher is away on vacation. I'm so excited, and so nervous at the same time! I'm excited to be in the position for the week to share the word with these kids but nervous that my fears will take over. I'm praying that God would take over it all and give me His words. I'm also continuing to pray that the kids would be open to what He has to teach them at camp, and that His will would be done in their hearts.

This week I came across this song and it's been encouraging me all week to remember that I belong to Christ, as believers we chosen to be His children. Only through the blood of His Son we are made blameless and worthy. Each day belongs to Him and He holds us each day.

Blameless- Dara Joy Maclean

What manner of love is this that you would lay down your life?
You paid the price, the sacrifice for redemption
Now I am determined to know, Christ and Him crucified
Now alive and the power in me is You

I’m blameless
You call me holy
I’ve been forgiven, You call me righteous
I’m free
I’m spotless, You call me worthy
I am Your child
You call me chosen
I’m Yours, I am Yours

"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ. For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will— to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that he lavished on us. With all wisdom and understanding, he made known to us the mystery of his will according to his good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ, to be put into effect when the times reach their fulfillment—to bring unity to all things in heaven and on earth under Christ.
In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will, in order that we, who were the first to put our hope in Christ, might be for the praise of his glory. And you also were included in Christ when you heard the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation. When you believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession —to the praise of his glory." -Ephesians 1:3-14

Know that in Him you are forgiven. You are chosen, worthy, holy, blameless. You are His and apart from Him we can do nothing.

Lesson Learned.

My lesson of the day: I need my time with God much more than I need an extra 10 or 15 minutes of sleep.

Seeking Him in ALL

As I've been reading through the old testament it has become completely clear that God's purpose through each situation is to draw us deeper into Him. I fully believe that God is working in each of our lives each day to mold us and shape us to be more like Him in order to bring Him glory. He is faithful through all and only when we are fully resting in Him will we be satisfied.

This past week at the beach I started reading a book called "Choosing to See" by Mary Beth Chapman, it is one amazing book so far and I encourage you to read it. At various points in the book Mary stops and explains how she has seen God working through the difficult times to prepare them for what was to lay ahead, to bring them closer to Him. I have been beyond blessed to not have any extremely difficult times in my life thus far yea I've had times of sadness, loneliness, and hurt but I haven't had to endure sickness, loss or death in the way that many people have. It's so encouraging to me to hear other peoples stories and know that as they are walking through the darkness they still see Him, that they hear His call and are pushed closer into Him.

I found this story today and it, once again, shares about how God uses situations to draw us closer to Him. This is Aaron Shust explaining an amazing piece of His story.


I pray that no matter what situations I am faced with that I would press in to Christ deeper than before that I would trust Him no matter what, that I would rest in His arms and know that He is faithful. I pray that when all comes crashing down around those that I love that they would see this too and cling to Christ. I pray that when the lives of those around me shatter that He would give me to words to encourage them to press deeper into Him and know that He is sovereign and beyond good.

"Shattered dreams are never random. They are always a piece in a larger puzzle, a chapter in a larger story. The Holy Spirit uses the pain of shattered dreams to help us discover our desire for God, to help us begin dreaming the highest dream. They are ordained opportunities for the Spirit to awaken, then to satisfy our highest dream." - Larry Crabb

Beach break!

Hey all! I've just returned from a week of beach and relaxation with my sister, parents and wonderful fiance :). It. was. glorious. Sunshine (a few thunderstorms) campfires, s'mores, beach, ocean, good food and fun for all. I'm so grateful for them all. It was especially nice to be able to spend so much time with Ethan and for my family to get to know him a little better and vice versa. It was nice to get away and not really have any responsibilities or places to be, to leave technology, for the most part, for a few days (I will say that my phone did not leave my bunk the entire week, which is quite an accomplishment for me :)) When I get breaks away from the computer and other forms of technology I realize how overly reliant I am on communication and how unnecessary it really is to have a phone on me constantly and check my computer multiple times a day... so hopefully this will be the start of a less-technology reliant me.

This coming week will be crazy busy. I'll be back at camp again doing the arts & crafts teacher thing, it's also my church's vacation bible school which I'll be helping with, AND I'll finally be starting my second job for this summer. Welcome back to reality! At least today is a free day so rest up for the insanity that is this week!

Have a wonderful week!

Faithfulness

Happy Fourth of July!

Today most of America is firing up the grills, heading to parades and getting their blankets ready for dusk to catch lightning bugs and watch the fireworks. I'm not entirely sure what I will get into today, I have a few things I'd like to do but honestly if all I did was watch the fireworks from the top of my street that would be okay with me :). Here's what I did last July 4th, not sure that picture will leave my head today.

If I could sum up what God's been teaching me these past few weeks in one phrase it would be that He is faithful. I've been reading through some of the old testament stories: Hosea, Joel, and I'm part-way through Amos and it's been amazing to see how through all the books God is using whatever situations His people are in to draw them back to Him. Most of the situations that his people are in are one's that they have brought upon themselves by living selfishly and desiring to live as if from this world. He doesn't like how they are acting and how their hearts are so against Him, but He never ever leaves them and continues to desire to have their whole hearts and lives. The same goes for us too. No matter what situations we have going in our lives at any given moment God is faithful through them and is working in and through it all- that's pretty incredible stuff! He is faithful.

This past week I started reading through a book called "This Momentary Marriage" by John Piper. It's a book about the biblical vision and purpose of marriage, so far it's really opened my eyes a lot to how vastly different the world's view of marriage is from God's original purpose for it. So far in the book Piper has made two points the build the foundation of what a biblical view of marriage is: It is God's design, and it is for God's glory- it is a display of His glory. It is a picture of how we as a believing body are the bride to Jesus, our bridegroom.
We are sinful, self-centered people yet God sent his sin-less son to die so we could spend eternity with Him. God sacrificed something so dear to Him for us because He was willing to do whatever it took to have us as His children.

"Christ will never leave his wife. Ever. There may be times of painful distance and tragic backsliding on our part. But Christ keeps his covenant forever. Marriage is a display of that! That is the ultimate thing we can say about it. It puts the glory of Christ's covenant-keeping love on display." - John Piper

Marriage is to put His covenant-keeping faithful love on display. He is faithful.

In church, the pastor has been going through the book of Judges. Today we went through chapters 8-9 which talked about Abimelech and Gideon- the main point of the message was that our choices have consequences but God does not just sit and watch us bring our lives to shambles from our selfish living- but continues to draw us near to Him, to call us to turn to Him. He is faithful.

Yesterday afternoon I went to visit family in New Jersey with my parents. On the car ride over I had quite a bit of time to think. I thought about how faithful God has been in my life and how he has turned every situation for His good. I thought about how he perfectly pieced things together when I was very young to lead my parents to send me to a daycare run by a church, which we eventually ended up attending. It was where I learned about Christ, and without it who knows what my life would be like today and if I would even know His truth.I think about high school and college and the situations I've been in- they haven't all been easy and most certainly I would not want to repeat many of them but God used them for His glory, he never left and he turned it all for His purposes and there is no regrets in Him. When I look back on my life I see God's hand. I see how He has been faithful, he has known what He's doing and it's all worked out for His good. Thinking through the lives of the people closest to me, I see it too. He is faithful.

It's so amazing to think about how different life would be if even one thing would have been different, if one piece was missing. I'm so grateful for all that God has done in my life for every experience and for how He's molding me to be more like Him. We serve a mighty God and words can't express all He is and all He's done and is doing.

Know today that God's hand is faithfully working in your life for His good. Each experience is just a brushstroke in the magnificent painting He's making out of our lives, and whole painting just a small paint splatter in His GRAND masterpiece.